Here I go again

I am sitting here for the second day in a row in my pajama's. I don't want to get dressed and if I don't have to I'm not going to. If I could I'd go to my appointment's in my PJ's. I just don't think my doctor's would like it to much if I showed up that way even though I see other people walking around in PJ's all the time. I hate cloths and when I have to get dressed as soon as I get back home I change back into my PJ's as soon as possible. It was hard when I was in Ohio with my sister to get dressed every day. I put it off for as long as I could every day and most times I didn't get dressed till my sister told me that we were going out some where. Maybe that's why we went out ever day. Just to get me dressed. Thanks sis. Maybe if I had a car here I'd get dressed every day but not having a car to go anywhere and having to beg or borrow a ride when I want to go somewhere means I have a lot of days to sit at home. I'm trying now to find a way to get to BJ's wholesale club to get water. I need to call my friend up here where I live and see if I can use his van to go in the next few days. Even if I only get two 5 gallon jugs of water at least I'll have some. Right now I have a 2 gallon in the refrigerator that I be done with later today. I drink a lot of water and need to get some for the water cooler.

There I go off on a tangent. I can't seem to get my thoughts together to write something substantial. Sorry. I am still trying to process my Dad's death. I haven't had anyone to really talk to about it. My therapist will be here this Friday so I'll have time to talk about it then. It's tough not having a good support system. I have friends but I don't feel comfortable talking to them about this. My sister's haven't been to open to talking about it and when we do talk about him we have different views of what he was like. It's hard to picture my dad the way one of my sisters describes him as. I saw a different side of him. He had changed a lot as he got older or maybe since he moved back to Corpus Christy. I don't know. I didn't see him the way my sister in Ohio did. Of course I had a big case of hero worship going on with Dad. I liked his sense of humor and she didn't. Sometimes I think she lost her sense of humor somewhere. There were things my Dad said or did that would piss her off but I thought were funny. Go figure.

Well that's all I can say today as I'm starting to cry again.